No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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