Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
More tranny stories later!
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
