Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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