They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
We left an ass print on the piano.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
