honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
