Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Randomize
