I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
