Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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