I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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