I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
