no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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