Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
