do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Randomize
