I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
there is puke in my bra ... again
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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