the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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