I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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