Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
