We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
