Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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