I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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