sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
