Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
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