New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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