I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
