The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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