I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
