I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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