I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
