My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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