Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
