now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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