he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
