I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
