Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
