oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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