he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
