Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Randomize
