i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
you didnt know i had herpes?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
