No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
