apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
