arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants