think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
