I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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