Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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