Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
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The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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