Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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