Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
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