so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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