I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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