Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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